my brother just killed himself

It iscommon for a person to feel relieved after a loved one dies, when the loved one had been living in pain and suffering. Bo Jackson was/is my favorite player/athlete bc of himmy first born son 5yrs old is named after him. Being in the presence of close friends and family has definitely helped me cope with my friends loss. I ask why and feel guilty as well. For me, serving others in need helps ease my pain. Sarah October 4, 2019 at 12:45 pm Reply. When I think about it, Im glad he doesnt hurt anymore. But you can hear it in their voice its not. When the poet Joanne Limburg's brother killed himself, she simply couldn't accept it. I felt like a failure and thought everyone would be better off without me. I lost my brother 8-12-2020. In that short time, he had seen his doctor twice, gone to two therapy sessions and a support group, and he and I had talked for hours. I am harsh with idiots who say the wrong things I tell them to get lost, to leave me alone ! She had filed for divorce moved out and was happy go lucky to collect the life insurance .when he did this she ddnt even call us. It was one of the last things I said. He said he was going for a walk. I never sought helpIve kept myself beyond busy as a distraction. I am writing this in hopes that someone thinking about suicide will read this. I have found that most mental health professionals are poorly trained to cope with child suicide s. Richardmcdo at gmail.com Take care, Richard. It wasnt selfish to me, it was a disease that finally took him. Ellie October 11, 2016 at 1:22 pm Reply. He was struggling with his family dynamic growing up and the concept of parenting his children. I am often angry at him for ruining New Years for me, and for abandoning me. The only thing that holds me back is my husband. My son was a third year medical student. Sad truth is nobody kills themselves but a person who wants to. My brother left behind 2 small children and a 21 year old son. We had plenty of great times, as we were together for 21 1/2 years, but unfortunately Im finding that the bad times are the ones that stick out most to me. Go climb the shedits only ice and snow on the ground it wont hurt if you fall. Although we might be worlds apart, I share your sorrow and anguish. Delivering the news to my daughter that her father had died was the worst and most painful thing I will ever have to do for my entire life. I think its very judgmental to tell a person what words are acceptable to use when they are being brave enough to put their grief out there. Jen I so agree with youdrugs and alcohol do such damage to the happy parts of the brain and the sadness created is unbearable for many people, Anita Pandolfe May 18, 2016 at 8:08 am Reply, Penny Caldwell May 18, 2016 at 12:38 am Reply. Frank, I am so sorry for your losses. Now we live in the countryside with some woods on one side of our property, which is the way he was heading. This is something I never ever thought of. I lost my mother to suicide when my youngest was about a year old. Houston Primos November 28, 2017 at 6:03 pm Reply, Hey Jill my name is house i am 24 years old as of today. Give yourself permission to get professional help. Moment by moment. but thats how powerful (it) is!!! Thank you for commenting. So sorry for your loss. When I was about 4 my house was being worked on by a family friend and one of the workers always brought his son who was about ten at the time. My narcissistic husband died by suicide almost 3 weeks ago, shortly before he died I asked him for a divorce. She had suffered this since a teenager, and was in and out of hospital. I live in different state and i could not find the time to visit her, instead we spoke on chat, our mutual good friend was visiting her as much as he could. I lost my cousin, my best friend, on 12/22/18 from suicide. Then I had to tell my mother. We miss our son immensely. *I miss you everyday, daddy. I didnt really like this guys other friends either, and I said to her that Ill just come knock for her in the morning if I dont turn up.. ( that phone call.. could of changed our lifes if it went differently ). So sad that this happened to all of us. I feel less scared now, and some peace knowing that my moms pain is over. On Monday at about 5:30 with my mom, brothers, his brother and myself all by his side the nurses took out the tube. I had tried to help my little brother for years. If you are thinking of hurting yourself, or even if you just need someone to talk with, please call the National Suicide Helpline at 1-800-273-8255 or visit their website where you can do a live online chat https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ All the best to you. I understand how complicated your grief is, and that it makes sense to ask how to go on, or why. My sister didnt want me around when I was at my lowest because it made her feel uncomfortable and it hurt but I got better without her and now she has regrets but Im not a monster so I forgave her. Self-care and all that. I saw her last on December 31st 2018 and she seemed to be in a good place. He put a rope over the beam Id been sitting under with him in his back yard. Four hours later, A police officer was knocking in front of my door then told me that my husband is deceased caused by self inflicted. I had become used to his deep depression, and he hid it well. Just one chance I need but unfortunately I dont even know if I will ever meet her again or not Plz tell me what to do. In addition to that I have been really caught up in my stressful job and sometimes when I first get home it first walk out my door, the sight of the car with stickers jogs my memory again, that this tragic thing that happened 3 days ago isnt staying in that day that it happened on, but its still true every day after that. Thank you for listening I just cant sleep or function and just needed to share. My moms dad lives with them and he called 911. At the week end she sent her partner to buy shopping, and he came home to find her hanging in the bathroom. My own life gets shorter each day, and I recognize this. She hung herself in a park near my neighbourhood. It was such a shock. I will stand by hubby and listen as im a strong person but God Im copping it for being so .. some days I just want to run away and return to normalIm ok but noone around me is.. the reason I still carry on is because of my dad and brothers and family and I have dreams. A life ripped away from ignorance. I just want half the person I use to be before his death. I feel very guilty because I feel like because of me my children do not have a father. I told him I loved him and I went home. They need you. Silence is generally the response that survivors receive from well meaning family and friends who dont know what to say so they say nothing. I saw the crusted wound from the open casket we had for his funeral the . it appeared that his chemistry was altered negatively after two months on a prescription he was given for his enlarged prostate. Thank you for your language suggestion. This is for all those who believe in light at the end of tunnel. I lost one of my best friends and longest friendship this last August. I just didnt want anything like this to happen to him. there are no words to describe how im feeling im truely heart broken. He was so easy yet so hard to love and I could never figure out why.. we fought often I was stupid and use to tell him to get out of my house and he would but then hed come home.. Thanksgiving weekend we had this HUGE fight he was with his parents and I was stupid and told him to move out.. There are not enough resources and trained support for the Survivors in my opinion. We are making it through, day by day. He was such a good person and my best friend. www.rhondafrankhouserbooks.com. Therapy and medications help. I am the father of two beautiful daughters. Thank you! Question why it happened until you no longer need to know why or until you are satisfied with partial answers. I cant help but blame myself because I knew he was struggling. My parents are divorced . We were planning to get married and I have known him for 12 years. Ill try to take the time to respond to each comment on the long flight home tomorrow, as they are so appreciated, but for now, going to try to sleep and hope against all hope that Ill wake up from this and discover it was all just a nightmare. OMG, I just watched the 60 Minutes segment about brain injury to soldiers who have experienced an explosion. A have regret is that I didnt take any photos of him at Thanksgiving. The whole day on repeat in my minds quietest times. It was the reality of our relationship and the abrupt end. I have 2 kids. . Ive done research and many studies in other countries recognize suicide as a high statistic killer in pregnant women, but up until last week none of us around her knew that. My parents both worked a lot my father at a prison 3rd shift and my mother as a nurse. I was 9. He showed no signs of depression prior to his death, just the alcoholism. Due to a less than desirable childhood we both saw me as the parental figure in the family, never learning coping skills or mature ways of handling my emotions thus never being able to properly parent my siblings. And also anniversary of death in February . How do we reconcile that we werent worth living for? I dont have a good answer, except you just do. I am very sorry for your loss. He and I were maintaining a long distance relationship so I never knew he was drinking the whole time, despite claiming sobriety. My brother took his life with a gun. He went traveling a couple of times to visit friends and our hearts almost burst in joy for him. Specifically EMDR therapy can be incredibly helpful for intrusive memories of specific traumatic events, and can help with regaining some sense of safety for caring for someone again. I tried everything i knew. Then go to reddit and see how people re saying they committed suicide. Her car sits there like shes going to drive it again, but its a misdemeanor to even open the door. I to am thankful to have found the helpline Sobs, after my first twin died. saige overson July 5, 2021 at 6:38 pm Reply. About a week later, we both graduated from different colleges. No matter how hard we try we can never be there at all times and we cannot always be able to save those we love. Then he started to. Maybe thats where he was, and he wanted me to know he was happy. In the first week, I heard from family and friends who didnt really know my son well. i question myself somedays was i a good sister. I detected no problems whatsoever. And he called unto him the twelve, and began to send them forth by two and two; and gave them power over unclean spirits; and commanded them that they should take nothing for their journey, save a staff only; no scrip, no bread, no money in their purse: but be shod with sandals; and not put on two coats. I am sorry. Guilt? Happiest guy ever with a great family. We loved each other and thats what countsjust like you and your daughter loved each other. Hell never graduate high school, or go into college like he wanted to do. , Mary Kral June 13, 2016 at 4:10 pm Reply. How and why did this have to happen to us? She took a piece of my heart with her. Some people cant imagine the mental and emotional pain that would cause a person to kill themselves, so they might make assumptions or judge the deceaseds actions, calling them weak or selfish. But I have to stay strong for my baby girl and husband! The grief is unbearable. We decided to go for an evaluation, and he was surprisingly admitted to the hospital. I am heartbroken. We chose to push forward. I prayed every day and asked God for his guidance and direction to help me go further into life. I am 23 years old, have been to 20 funerals in the past 10 years, and none of them have ever haunted me quite like this. Only you know whats best for you. I am immensely grateful for the few websites I have found that talk about suicide grief, as it makes me feel a little less alone with my grief. Everyone likely believed she was invincible because of this, as she appeared to be a very strong and determined woman. Richard Martino May 1, 2021 at 7:54 pm Reply, Julia I lost my daughter two years ago she was 37 years old she was my oldest daughter I have one other daughter my oldest daughter Amber I lost my daughter two years ago she was 37 years old she was my oldest daughter I have one other daughter my oldest daughter Amber was struggling struggling all the time. have tried to reach out to my BFFs husband and daughters to give my condolences but cant seem to find them home and dont have their phone numbers. I knew her well and knew all wed endured throughout our childhood (all the family secrets). He didnt leave you alone-he is in your heart and mind. All of the pain and anger and relief and stress you will experience is normal, and although I may not be a counselor or a therapist, you can contact me at matthewenzel@gmail.com if you need to talk about it. I was 25 at the time I became the biggest liqour abuser I have ever known and its only gotten worst . I made promises to him I dont that I could ever make to anyone elseand I never will. I live in NZ, there is still great stigma around suicide here, and debate about how much should be reported in the media regarding the high suicide rates here. i screamed his name and ran towards him . It is all, admittedly, a work in progress. I console myself that even if it dies too, it doesnt matter right now. He was 34 and had been battling something I will never understand. People say I am strong. The pain isnt as strong. I moved him back to our home after his 2nd attempt and also sent him to a rehab centre in KZN. Im so sorry for what you are going through. here seems like a good place to just, i dont know, put it out? What I didnt know at the time is on that phone call he was walking out to the woods by our house to hang himself. I hope the police find him. . That was the headline to a news story on April 10 at News24.com . . Kristins reply and nice words, are a little hope!. My mom is dead and I have no siblings.

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